By: Jocelyn Spencer
I wanted this collage to reflect some of the common unrealistic expectations (hence the title of the piece) placed on women, which are reinforced through messages on social media. A woman isn’t supposed be too skinny, but she also shouldn’t be too fat. A woman is supposed to show a little skin, but if she shows too much she’s told to cover up. If a women wears “too” much makeup she’s told she’s beautiful without it, but when she goes without it she looks off. A woman must be sexual, but if she’s too sexual she’s called a slut/whore/hoe, and if she’s not sexual enough she’s called a prude. It seems no matter how a woman presents herself, she is never perfect enough in the eyes of American society. Each of these images shows a time where an unrealistic pressure was placed on a woman.
Why Should We Care?
It’s easy to believe that this is just a personal trouble when you look at it from the viewpoint of some women who couldn’t take the heat when their weight, clothes, makeup or sexuality were placed under scrutiny. However, when you take a step back and realize that these are pressures that every woman in America faces, and it effects the way that she perceives and values herself, you can see that this is in fact a public issue. When these unrealistic expectations are placed on women, it’s hard to block out the negativity and some might turn to unhealthy outlets to try and meet those expectations. For example, scrutinizing a woman’s weight can lead to an unhealthy relationship with food, such as eating disorders like anorexia or bulimia.
Changing the Narrative
As the women of American society, we need to change the way we talk about each other. When men try and tell us we’re “too fat” or “too thin”, we have to be the ones to tell each other that we are perfect the way we are. When men try to tell us to “show a little skin” or “cover up”, we have to be the ones to tell each other that we can wear whatever we want to. When men try to tell us we’re wearing “too much makeup” or “not enough makeup”, we have to be the ones to tell each other it doesn’t matter whether or not we use makeup. When men try to call us a “slut/whore/hoe” or a “prude”, we have to be the ones to tell each other that we’re allowed to express ourselves sexually to whatever degree we feel comfortable. The time for change is now, and it starts with you.
Change at the Higher Level
It is unfair of me to place all of the responsibility for change on the women who are already burdened with society’s heavy unrealistic expectations to begin with, especially when the men contribute to perpetuating this narrative. So how do we make sure that everyone is held accountable?
I believe that if there were policies in place that required K-12 schools to educate their students on gender equality, this would create generations of Americans who would treat women differently than those before them. In addition to this, implementing policies that require companies to hold workshops to educate their workforce on proper language use and order their H.R. departments to monitor infractions within their workforce, would help to change the narrative at an organizational level.
